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Xenu — Tech Breakthrough after all these years

There’s been a discussion recently on alt.religion.scientology about what the most famous person in Scientology lore, Lord Xenu, actually looked like. Somebody, who should know better, wrote that he was a galactic Emperor, not one of those bug-like guys. Actually, Xenu was both, a galactic despot with ET features. Although his eyes are not musciform, they’re definitely not wogoid® , as wogs® now appear seventy-five million years after Xenu really goofed the floof. Probably it’s most accurate to call his eyes, which really are a distinctive facet of his appearance, lemurid or lemurine.

The best picture of Xenu is undoubtedly the one Time Magazine published on the cover of its “Person of the Billennium” issue, which on this occasion is a story that Time got absolutely right.

He is shown on a trading card from the Intergalactic Tyrant Cards® collection with antennae, but these flagella do not appear in other likenesses of Xenu that have come down through the ages, so must not be automatically accepted as authentic.

The few sculptures of Xenu that have survived these past millions of years pretty well all show him with Lemurian oculi, and with various hats, crowns, and perhaps even rugs.

The only representations known to now exist of what are believed to be Xenu’s children are on a pair of vases carbon dated to the Xenusian period, which show them, obviously male and female, with all their tyrant father’s facial features, and antennaless.

There is considerable speculation that may never be resolved concerning Xenu’s hair, or lack thereof, but there is one image that shows him sporting a powder blue bouffant, or perhaps a peruque. In most other images, aside from his hats, tiaras or wigs, Xenu appears to be as bald as his kids’ pudenda.

There has also been a great deal of speculation concerning Xenu in present time, seventy-five million years after his alleged icing, nuking and implanting of billions upon billions of citizens of the Galactic Confederation, and reconstituting them as the wog race plus cooties. Has he escaped, as some people have suggested, how has he survived those millions of years, what are his plans, that sort of thing.

As everybody knows, Hubbard wrote, “When through with his crime, Loyal Officers (to the people) captured him after 6 years of battle and put him in an electronic mountain trap where he still is.” That’s why I’m writing this and bothering to research what Xenu looks like.

People send me stuff all the time, for which I’m very grateful, and without which I wouldn’t get anything. Well I just got this photo of what has been represented to be Xenu in what could be an electronic trap.

Xenu in an electronic mountain trapThe features are remarkably similar to those of the Time Magazine Xenu, which validates both of the images. The photo appears recent, meaning very recent given that Xenu has been in whatever mountain it is for seventy-five million years, and photos, unlike statues and vases, only go back, in any form, about one five hundred thousandth of that time.

And this photo is no daguerreotype. For one thing, it’s in color. It hasn’t been subjected to all possible tests by any means, but an initial inspection says it’s never been photoshopped. There is no clue I’ve been able spot as to what mountain the photo was taken in, or even if it was in a mountain. Some wog familiar with cryonics might have a clue what the glass and metal objects behind Xenu’s trap could be. I’d love to hear too from the person who sent the photo, because of the importance of this subject to all of us.

In respect of Xenu, posted to a.r.s. just before 1400 Thursday Mauna Loa and Kilauea Packaging Plant Time.


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