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The 2006 Challenge. What do you think?

For me, this is a proof that Scientology makes suckers even bigger suckers. It makes the bright dimmer. Before I got into Scientology, I didn’t think that, by thinking, a person could increase his body weight by thirty pounds. Otherwise I would have thought that you’d have to stop a person from thinking to get a scale to settle down to weigh him. When I became a Scientologist I was taught to think just that, and I thought just that, that thoughts could increase, or decrease, a person’s physical weight, actually measured on scales, by thirty pounds. I thought it because L. Ron Hubbard said it and taught it, and as a Scientologist I accepted what Hubbard said. To doubt Hubbard was a very negative condition to be in as a Scientologist, and immediately and severely punished. I had become dumber, and a bigger sucker.

When I left Scientology, I knew that Hubbard, the source of the idea that by thinking, that is, by mocking up or creating mental image pictures, a person could increase his body weight by thirty pounds, was bullshitting. I also knew by then that Hubbard was a monumental bullshitter, and that the thirty pounds of thought was just one pile amongst tons of his bullshit, actually measured on scales. So, by getting out of Scientology I became smarter.

This is not to do with wisdom, which is another subject for another discussion, but to intellect. I would have answered on an IQ test that no, a scale that weighs human bodies is not the apparatus for measuring thought, so my intelligence quotient had gone up. Getting out of Scientology was a gift far beyond the increased intelligence, because as a born-again wog I gained the possibility of wisdom, which is unthinkable in Scientology. So I could maybe do something with the sudden intelligence increase. It could be that the more that is debunked of the debunkable that had bunked you, the more intelligence you have left over or available, but that’s another discussion too.

In any event, I just now thought, that to be perfectly fair, I will give the Scientologists the opportunity, which they all cannot but seek, to make Hubbard right and me wrong. In fact, I will give wogs the same opportunity.

Virtually every Scientologist and pretty well every wog can find a doctor’s scale or a bathroom scale. And virtually every Scientologist and every wog can think. They can all mock up or create mental image pictures. All that is needed is to get them all, Scientologists and wogs, to do both things at once. Get on a scale, and think. For example, mock up a picture of a cat. See how much weight increase the scale registers. Graph the stats.

That’s the 2006 Challenge. Think really heavy thoughts. See what kind of weight you can think up. I believe that Hubbard first made the thirty pounds of thought claim in 1956, so this is a fine fiftieth anniversary review of his test tech.

Hubbard also says that as well as adding thirty pounds to a person’s body weight by creating mental energy while it stands on scales, a person can subtract thirty pounds from his or her body by casting away heavy mental image pictures. This would be the way to go for fat people. Rather than mocking up the poundage, mock it off.

Hubbard really isn’t clear about which thoughts fat folks should think, or not think, or cast away to get their weights down, and which thoughts, for example, body builders should think to bulk up. A thirty pound mass of thoughts is probably a lot harder to handle or dodge than, for example, a thirty pound steel shot, so don’t get too close to a fat person on a scale if he or she looks about ready to think.

A hundred and ten pound jockey thinking away thirty pounds before a race would give his horse a huge weight advantage, so if it does turn out Hubbard’s right, racing commissions must be advised. The jockey could just think the thirty pounds back on for the post race weigh-in. If this jockey is a Scientologist, and uses beams, he could get all the other jockeys mocking up massy mental image pictures, bulk them all up thirty pounds right there on their mounts, and actually gain a sixty pound advantage over them.

Where an instantaneous thirty-pound weight gain would probably be most advantageous would be in the lighter boxing divisions. A one hundred pound strawweight fighter who mocked up the right mental image pictures at the right time, which would be, of course, after the pre-fight weigh-in, would jump eight divisions and go into the fight at one hundred thirty pounds. If he could get his opponent thinking thoughts that drop him thirty pounds, down to seventy pounds, the big thinking boxer would come into the fight almost twice as heavy.

A really obese person could lose thirty pounds of weight by casting away mental image pictures one day, come back the next and cast away some more, and drop another thirty. After five days, the person would be down a solid hundred fifty pounds. A jockey following this regimen, however, would be completely gone in under four days.

So be really careful what you think out there. If you’re already a bit bulky, be sure, for example, that the scale you’re using can handle another sudden thirty pounds, in case you erroneously mock up some heavy mental images instead of casting them away and break the scale. If you’re already a couple of inches short of a common ordinary run-of-the-mill garden-variety wog and you inadvertently think the wrong way, remember the thirty pounds have got to come from somewhere. If your height is a big deal to you, and you see thirty pounds dropping on your scale, well think again.

Here’s what Hubbard wrote in his book Understanding the E-Meter in the 1988 edition © L. Ron Hubbard Library:

It has also been discovered in Scientology that mental energy is simply a finer, higher-level physical energy. The test of this is conclusive in that a thetan "mocking up" (creating) mental image pictures and thrusting them into the body can increase the body mass and by casting them away again can decrease the body mass. This test has actually been made and an increase of as much as thirty pounds, actually measured on scales, has been added to and subtracted from a body by creating "mental energy." Energy is energy. Matter is a condensation of energy.

These are actual illustrations from the book, showing a man on a scale thinking thirty pounds of thoughts. The mental image pictures he’s mocking up appear to be Rorschach blots, which could be really heavy. So definitely include some Rorschachian images in your challenge test. But again, I must caution that if you’re already on the massive side, you’d probably want to be casting away any Rorschach blot images you’ve got, rather than risk ballooning out of control or crushing the scale by mocking up more blots.

Take photos, or better yet, take videos. Just step onto a scale, focus your video camera on the LED display, or the arrow, and think big.

In the same E-Meter book, and throughout Scientology literature, Hubbard related needle and Tone Arm movement to mental image pictures and their mass, so consider having a meter with you as you stand on the scale. If you see your weight jumps thirty pounds or so, have an eye on the meter, because your TA, according to Hubbard, should have gone through the roof. And if you see you’re suddenly dropping thirty pounds, then you should be getting quite a blowdown. I think, however, as I said, that Hubbard was a big BSer, and you’d have to have a few lifetimes of blowdowns before they added up to thirty pounds, actually measured on scales. Nevertheless, I’m open minded, and willing to examine other people’s results.

But take the challenge. Test your thoughts. Jump the scale. Was Ron full of it, or what?

 
 
 
 

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